Time out

As I was working today I was thinking and many titles came to mind. I think this one seems fitting. I have come to a point this year where I am going to have to regather and regroup for next year. "This just sucks" is a nice way of putting it. Do you every feel as if you have been put in a time out. Like God says take a break. Well I do and don't. It is my way of saying to myself that there is a reason for this. I don't know exactly why I would be in time out but I sure there is something.

I feel like I am going to let people down this year in many aspects of my life. I am not getting enough sleep so I am always tired when I get home. This obviously affects my evening plans. Plus there are probably more things. The most current thing is my running. I have not called my running partner yet but I will have to inform them that I cannot run at least a whole marathon and the half would still be in question. They are planning in starting the training in like a week and a half. I will not go see the main doctor until after that. Until then I cannot even run, use the elliptical properly or stuff like that. I have to give it rest. Then even if they want me to start running again I probably will have to start off slow. Like a mile.
I just feel like I am letting them down. I know they can run without me. They are better than I am but I can't help that feeling. I quess I will just bite the bullet and give them a call. I will miss the great feeling when my Wife looks at me. She doesn't admit it but she gets bummed out to. It makes me proud when my Wife is proud of me. It makes me feel good when I see the smile on her face. It just makes me happy and know I won't be able to have that this fall. I know she loves me without running. I just can't help feeling like I let her down also.

For now I have to stay on the elliptical. I HATE that thing. It is like climbing stairs forever. It doesn't make me feel any better to think I am climbing my way to heaven. I just have to use this thing as a weight loss tool. I need to get my weight down so my ankle feels better.

Well enough of my complaining. Hopefully today will be better. I will hit the gym this evening. That always makes me feel good when I am done.

Later.